I kind of enjoy busting the freshmens' asses.

A huge batch of disciplinary letters just got logged in to the mail for the freshmen too dumb to hide their partying, and I really enjoy when one of them comes along so I can smile smugly at them. Is that cruel? They're all incredibly spoiled and ridiculous.

This is an actual conversation my friend had with one of them:

Dumb Freshman Girl: Excuse me, can you smell this milk for me?
Tiff: Sorry?
DFG: I just need to know if it's bad.
T: Did you check the expiration date?
DFG: Yeah, it's not expired yet. I didn't refrigerate it, and it smells weird.
T: You DIDN'T refrigerate it?
DFG: I didn't know you were supposed to.
T: ...
DFG: My mom does all the grocery shopping.
T: You've never helped her put away the groceries?
DFG: That's what our maid is for.

SRSLY.

ETA: OKAY. A girl just asked me if I knew why her mail key wasn't working. Why, yes, I'm well-acquainted with the inner mechanical workings of these 15-year-old mailbox locks. *eyeroll*

It's a little gross. Or a LOT gross.

So, yeah, I'm very stern with them. I do my best to be intimidating, actually. I'm scary. :P

But you all guys know me better than that. ;)

Anyway, I realize I haven't explained two situations: my roommates and Lacie.

Me, my roommates, and our two male fixtures: Let's see if you can follow this--

My best friend at MICA is Robin, who liked Betsy, but Betsy likes Ryan who's hooking up with Jen who's still interested in her ex-boyfriend Dylan (who is from Squirrel Hill, by the way). AND Betsy is still mourning her recent ex, who ended their 5-year relationship in June.

Sheesh.

Betsy just started talking to her ex again, and it has been the cause of several loud fights with her mom over the phone that ring clearly through the narrow hallway of our apartment.

So, on to Lacie: She defriended me a week ago for absolutely no good reason. She defriended me because I deigned to still like Abby M., Brian's pre-and-post-Lacie flame. Stupid, stupid, stupid. Then she shaved her head and deleted her Facebook entirely. Yup. It happened.

It just started raining, and my first listen to Jack's Mannequin's new album, The Glass Passenger is winding down. It's a good album. :)

Also, to whoever watched Gossip Girl last night--WHAT. Also, Lacie reminds me far too much of Queen!Serena to be entirely comfortable.

It just reminds me how good you all are to me, and how blessed I am to have you.

Muah!

-Alyssa

Personal Letters.

To Drea--

I'm so sorry about Nick. I know we both knew you guys wouldn't get married, but it's still so disappointing to see that structure you've built up for almost four years collapse so unceremoniously.

I would have hoped that Nick would have more respect for you, and a willingness to, if not work harder, let you down more gracefully than this. For someone who seems to be so even, his whims and emotions get the better of him sometimes.

You were in love for a long time, and I can't imagine how much this sucks. But you know you'll always have us.

To Emily--

I'm so excited for you to head off to England and have a blast and meet new people and make new friends (but not make TOO good of friends and forget us :P). You deserve it and I can't wait to hear your stories!

I'm ESPECIALLY excited for you to spend your break with me in Italy! Hopefully, by the time your break rolls around, I'll have gotten the hang of Florence and my routine. :) And we can go woo some Italian men. For you, of course, if you haven't found a cute and charming Oxfordian by then. :P

To our awesome upcoming spring! Cheers!

To Ab-Fab--

Despite whatever conflict arises, I'm really glad you're with Greg, and have had the chance to feel what it's like to be cherished. You're completely cherishable, and I hope you know that that's the way it should always be, not just "the best it could be".

You're awesome and we want you to take care of yourself! Love you!

To Bri--

Where are yoooooou?! You should get out of the wilderness for an hour to blog and let us all in on your adventures. Bear Grylls would be jealous. :P Either way, meet some brawny ski instructor while you're at it. :D You're so lovely and smart and funny, and it would be nice to hear from you more often!

Love you guys!

-Alyssa

P.S. I totally told Hot!Ryan he was hot last night, and I wasn't even embarrassed! I rule. :P

P.P.S. Oh, and I never mentioned that Lacie defriended me on Facebook, did I?

!

September 26, 2008



Dear Alyssa,



We are pleased to announce that MICA has accepted your application to the MICA@SACI honors program for the spring 2009 semester. Congratulations! We will now send your application to SACI. SACI will be in touch with you directly regarding important logistical details of your semester in Florence.

:D:D:D:D:D

So, I got accepted, and even better: I'm still eligible for SACI's big scholarship. :)

This is awesome. I was here at the desk with Robin and Paul when I opened the e-mail, and I just thought it was about the scholarship part, which the International Affairs officer called me about earlier today already, but I read the opening lines, and this understanding just seeped through me, and this contentment and satisfaction welled up. It was really great, and Paul and Robin were happy for me, although they said they would miss me. :)

This is really cool. Dear Lord, let this pan out properly, please!

:)

In other news, I talked to Mom about Chase's visit, and she insists that Chase comes and talks to her. I expressed that I thought it was silly that it should be a requirement, and I didn't like that since Chase will do what I ask of him, it comes down to me choosing my relationship with him or compromising the one I have with my Mom. She assured me that it wouldn't change our relationship if I chose to tell Chase not to talk to her, that she would still love me and I'd still be her daughter.

I know this, but if the contempt is already breeding (and it is), there will be a change whether I speed the process or not. She already doesn't want me dating him, him going to talk to her isn't going to change that. I also expressed that while I'm her daughter and I know she wants to protect me, I'm also her nearly-TWENTY year old daughter, and I should be allowed to make my own decisions regarding MY relationship with Chase.

I see my Mom's concerns, and, honestly, I want her and Chase to talk, but if she's already set on disapproving of him until she deems me old enough to date him (yes, she said that), then what's the point?

I told her I would tell Chase to go talk to her, but now I'm thinking of calling her back and telling her to mind her own business, basically. She said herself that she needed to start transitioning out of "Active Parenting" and into "Consulting".

Also, she asked me point-blank if Chase said "I love you". Naturally, I couldn't lie, but I framed it by saying that I told him what was what, and she took it WAY better than I expected.

I got pretty emotional during the talk--although I don't think she could tell I was getting choked up. You see, my Mom and I never have these kind of conflicts. I am very interested in making my family proud of me, and in showing them I can make good decisions for myself. I hate when I disappoint them, and I hate it even more when I KNOW I'm not making a poor choice, and they're still disappointed. Sheesh.

What do you guys think about the situation? Be honest!

Love,
Alyssa

The big M.

Chase FINALLY said the "M" word out loud, directly, last night. He's only been delicately alluding to marriage for the last few weeks, and he's finally spit it out.

I have to say, again, not to worry, He didn't present it as an option yet, but as a distant possibility, once I'm graduated and available and if things keep going as well as they are now. We of course started talking about weddings--I mentioned Kamala's engagement and the ensuing chaos. :P So I told him that I'd been thinking about it more, about flowers and dresses and a guest list, and it was amazing how easily we slipped into talking about a wedding.

AGAIN: WE ARE NOT GETTING MARRIED ANYTIME SOON, IF EVER.

It was nice to talk about, though. It really was. Our talks have been getting more and more enjoyable and lovely, and I can't wait to have him here in person to talk about it more. And, of course, you'll all be kept in the loop.

And, once again, Mom's absurdity rears it's ugly head. I haven't told her that Chase and I are official, much less that he's visiting in two weeks, although I did allude something to Lauren today on the phone. She told me that mom had mentioned that Chase had to go through her if he intended to visit, and stay in a hotel room. First of all, "HA." and second of all, "No."

Don't get me wrong, I have every intention of remaining respectful to my mom--I love her and want her to be okay with this. BUT, I'm not about to make Chase shell out $200/night on a hotel just to see me, and it's not her decision to make.

Sheesh. But I do have to tell her within the week, and pray she doesn't try to corner him at work. :/

Anyway, another page to write on a paper and sleep time.

Love you all,

Alyssa :)

Hey guys!

Hi!

It's been awhile since I've updated, although I can't say there's much to recap.

Chase is supposed to come visit soon, in 2 weeks, I think. He called last night and wanted to talk to Robin and my roommates, which was a very pleasant little thing. They all said he seemed really nice, and he said they were great. :) I can't wait for him to meet them! I can't wait for him to get here!

That being said, we had a funny conversation about sleeping arrangements that went like this:

Chase: What are your expectations for when I get there?
Alyssa: What do you mean? (Translation: I know exactly what you mean, but you need to say it.)
C: ...
A: I want you to sleep in my bed, but I think it might be best if you sleep on the couch.
C: Me too. I was going to do that. You can just come visit me on the couch.
A: Exactly!
C: And if you happen to fall asleep there or vice-versa...
A: Right, of course.
C: We're not fooling anyone.
A: No we are not.

Is that lame? Should I be stricter?

To whoever is watching Gossip Girl:

IT'S AN ADDICTION. I'M A PATHETIC HUMAN BEING BUT I CARE DEEPLY ABOUT WHAT GOES ON IN THESE FICTITIOUS CHARACTERS' LIVES. I GIVE A (RATHER LARGE) DAMN ABOUT CHUCK AND BLAIR. (ALTHOUGH I COULDN'T GIVE A SMALLER DAMN ABOUT DAN AND SERENA), AND IT'S GOTTEN TO THE POINT WHERE JOEY V. AND I HAVE A PHONE DATE AFTER THE EPISODE ENDS. SAD.

(BUT WONDERFUL.)

Ahem. Enough of that. :)

Last night, me, Betsy. Hot!Ryan. Jen, and Robin had a blast dancing in our hallway--we had a strobe light (thanks to Betsy), and ended up taking some cool pictures (I'm sure you'll see them on Facebook in the next few days). Not to mention some amazing extended-exposure photos, tres cool.

Also, Hot!Ryan is hot.

Love you girls, and miss you!

-Alyssa

Today in Cafe Doris...

I saw a girl wearing electric blue lamé leggings, a striped bikini top and what looked like an American flag draped around her neck. Even for art school: What the eff?

Not much to report, other than that my mom didn't turn in her W-2s which means Financial Aid won't process my account which means Student Accounts won't sign my SACI application which means my SACI application didn't get in on time to be considered for a SACI scholarship. Granted, it was unlikely that out of the however many students that apply, I would get much, if anything, but I'd rather be considered and not get it, then not get it because I didn't get the chance to be considered. Ah well, two more weeks 'til the final deadline.

I miss you guys! And you know what, we need to hug more often/be more physically affectionate with each other. We don't snuggle enough! :P (Aren't you glad we've already parted for the year so I can't put this in effect immediately? :P)

I've been giving an unusual amount of thought to my eventual wedding party. Once again, DON'T PANIC, but the bridesmaid dress problem is one I feel the need to apply myself to. Weird.

Love ya/Miss ya/Want ya,

Alyssa

A LOT of Updates.

First of all, the SACI application process has been killing me. Not even the actual application, but the financial hoops to jump through before I even complete my entrance essay!

Second of all, I got a very interesting text message on Thursday night at one AM. From Chase. It included the "L" word. Directed at me. Yup.

So, of course, I called him immediately, expecting this to be another drunk-dialing debacle--I think I told you guys about that one. So, he answers, sounding absolutely normal:

Me: HI.
Him: Hello.
Me: How...are...you?
Him: Fine--how are you?
Me: Um, okay. Are you...okay?
Him: Yeah.
Me: Are you sober?
Him: (in a meaningful way) Yes.
Me: OH. Well.
Him: Are you okay?
Me: Yeah, just, er, surprised.
Him: At what?
Me: (in my mind: "AT WHAT?!!") Your...text message.
Him: Yeah.
Me: Okay...
Him: Okay?
Me: Okaaaay...when did this come about?
Him:...Can I call you back?
Me: Er, I guess.
Him: I'll call you right back.
*click*

The next ten minutes is me freaking out to Marla and Paul, who just witnessed this exchange.

Then I get a text message again: "I love you, deal with it."

Me: "Oh, HELL no." So, naturally, I call him again:

Him: Hello?
Me: You don't get to do that!
Him: Do what?
Me: TEXT me this kind of stuff! We've talked about this!
Him: So?
Me: WHY did you send it in a text?
Him: Because I wanted to say it now.
Me: WHY DIDN'T YOU AT LEAST CALL ME?
Him: I said what I wanted to say when I wanted to say it. Deal with it.
Me: NO. Not how it works. This is why...

So, we talked in circles like that for about twenty minutes until he finally admitted that he could've presented his feelings in a much more sympathetic way. Then, wow...

Then he started saying all these lovely things about how beautiful I was and how all of his thoughts about me are beautiful and how much he wants to hold me, and, ahem, do other things...

Then he pretty much said he wants to marry me.

ANYWAY, I was stunned and flattered and honored and little anxious (both kinds). I can see your stunned faces in my mind, too, and let me tell you, they're pretty hilarious. :) Trust me, there are NO wedding bells to be heard for MANY more years.

He called me yesterday morning to apologize again, and intends to tell me all of his feelings in person when he visits. This is NUTS!

Okay, I have to go, but I'll catch you girls soon. Call me!

Muah,

Love, Alyssa

A bootcamp private's letter to his girlfriend.

"I think of you 24/7. Whan we're standing in formation, while we're standing in line at the chow hall, while we're marching, during the church services, at night when I'm laying in my bunk staring at the cieling, when I'm scrubbing the bathroom floors, when I hear the guys singing Hannah Montana songs, definitely when we're talking about our girls back home, when I look at the stars during morning PT, when I see this white cat that's been hanging around our barracks, when I hear about the hurricanes (which make me nervous), when I'm making my bed in the morning... Almost everything reminds me of you. We were talking about different ways to propose to a girl and I'm pretty proud of my ideas. This place has made me realize how much of a blessing you are to me and how much I really love you. I wouldn't be as brave as I am now without you."

The Big Bang

An elite group of seven scientists are aiming to recreate the Big Bang tomorrow in Switzerland.

I'm not sure how I feel about that. It scares me, actually. Maybe I'm being stupid, but it just doesn't sit right. It's like the Tower of Babel to me.

I guess the only thing I can do to feel less weird about it is to pray about it.

Happy Cake Day, by the way! Hope you guys ate your cake!

Love you,
Alyssa

Unhealthy!

I am getting increasingly obsessed with reading the 'missed connections' page on Craigslist. You all know how much of a sap I am, after all. Sometimes the messages are like "U had blond hair adn u were soooo hott.", but sometimes they're like "You were wearing a blue dress and you took my breath away."

:)

I've looked through the Pittsburgh and Baltimore ones (and found a proposition for a professor @ MICA), and have started making my way through other cities, letting myself peek into other people's lives.

Like this one, from a 29-year-old man, posted yesterday from the Upper West Side:

'we were walking in opposite directions. i picked up your earring and caught up to you. when i got your attention, i handed you the earring and said, "here you go, ma'am. now you be careful. this city's no place for an earring all by itself." you smiled. i walked away.'

Sigh.

I am, indeed, a sap.

I had a lovely weekend. Stayed up far too late, ate too much candy, drank more alcohol than I ever have (although that just equals 1 and 3/4 glasses of wine and 3/4 of a beer over two evenings), had the right amount of fun and the right amount of drama, had a few awesome phone calls/online conversations, and I feel pretty good all around. :)

My school friends are practically bribing me to stay in Baltimore this spring instead of studying abroad. It's so tempting! But, of course, I'm going to submit my application, I'm not an idiot.

Miss you guys, update your damn blogs! :P I know you're reading this!

Love you,
Alyssa

I got Chase's first letter.

:)

(I think that sums it up nicely.)

(Love, Alyssa)

I just make a new one every few weeks, don't I?

In reference to yesterday's cheery post--I sat outside in the sunshine with Marla, Robin, and Michael, just shooting the breeze for a couple hours--it was nice. :)

I have a whole new To-Do List to conquer, on a much tighter schedule:

To-Do:

-Receive Mom's shipment of artwork. (MOM. SEND IT.)
-Fill out MICA application.
-Fill out SACI application.
-Write Statement of Intent.
-Get Passport photos taken.
-Scan/label artwork.
-Put labeled pieces on CD.
-Get all the necessary signatures.
-Recieve Mom's Financial Aid e-mail. (MOM. WRITE IT.)
-Update my Financial Aid dealio.
-Pay Rent.
-Buy 19th Century French Art textbook. (OR find it in the library and scan it.)

Okay, wish me luck!

You guys need to update, darnit.

Love you,
Alyssa

:)

Do you ever sit with friends, just totally casually, just talking and laughing for a little while, and come away feeling so full and thankful you can only smile? That was me today. That's what makes me know that God is looking out for me. The fact that he put these people in my life show me everything that God is. It's the best feeling.

First Grave Shift of the Year.

So, here I am at the Commons, for my first grave since last semester. I took a caffeine pill and I'm ready to roll!

It's good to be back, I reconnected with Melissa and everyone, and when classes start I'll be seeing even MORE people and that excites me--heck, I even like getting to see the new freshmen!

My room is looking fab--I set up my bed frame today, so I feel very talented in carpentry right now. Go me. :) I'll have to take some pictures soon.

But, even though I've been getting back into the MICA swing of things, I'm totally jonesing for you guys ('You guys' being Em, Bri, AbFab and Drea, for those extras who read the blog, not that I don't love you too!)! I just wish we'd had more time to pal around--I only saw Bri for a day! But, I'll see you all soon enough, I hope! (VISITVISITVISIT<---my subliminal message to you.)

As some of you may have seen in my note, my classes for this semester are thus:

Monday: Native American Art (For now.)
Tuesday: 19th Century French Art
Wednesday: Intro to Ceramics
Thursday: Illustration Concepts and Short Fiction Workshop
Friday: Day off! :)

I'm looking forward to starting my classes--I feel like I'm struggling to remain occupied!

Ooh, 12:34 am. Make a wish! That this year will be fruitful and successful. Is that the same thing? OH WELL.

Anyway, I'm sure I'll be wishing I was unoccupied after a few weeks of classes. :P When that time comes, just remind me what I'm doing here! :D

You guys need to update me more about what you're doing! I feel like my word are dropping into the Internet Void. Gimme something to work with! :P

Miss you and love you dearly,
Alyssa